Sensitive Boy

My husband and I are faced with a very delicate and difficult situation at home. We have a very sensitive son who gets his feelings hurt easily.  He is well liked at school and most of the time gets along well with his classmates. Like most eight-year-old kids, he’s trying to figure out the social rules of second grade.

My husband was a worrier as a kid, and it seems like my son has a very similar personality. Just yesterday, he came out of school upset about something. It takes some coercing to get him to talk to us, but I finally got the information out of him. Turns out, he made a mistake in music class, and he was embarrassed by it. I asked him if anyone made fun of him, no they didn’t, he said. 

He is a tender-hearted little boy, and that’s why everyone loves him. He always stands up for people who get picked on at school. I just worry that he will become the chum in the shark tank if he doesn’t learn to thicken his skin a little.  He’s an honorable boy, is so sweet to his sister, does well in school, and I don’t want to mess up his personality for something that could just be a phase that most kids go through. We have set up a reward system that we give him one star for every day that he doesn’t cry. He and his sister are working toward a visit to Disneyland. 

My husband and I have had numerous disagreements on the approach to “toughen him up.” My son is not as socially astute as his younger sister (she is a force to be reckoned with, even at age five), and he is quick to tear up.  Sometimes I think he will grow out of it, but I still reinforce that it is not acceptable for any reason to cry at school. My husband thinks we should have some tough love solutions, but I fear that will only lead to resentment. 

If you are a parent of a child that has gone through this, I would love to hear from you. Any suggestions? Are we on the right path? 

Thanks for reading!